Bathroom Break

When you have to visit a public bathroom, you usually find a line of women, so you smile politely and take your place. Once it's your turn, you check for feet under the stall doors. Every stall is occupied. Finally, a door opens and you dash in, nearly knocking down the woman leaving the stall. You get in to find the door won't latch. It doesn't matter, the wait has been so long you are about to wet your pants! The dispenser for the modern seat covers is handy but empty. You would hang your purse on the door hook, if there was one, but there isn't-- so you carefully, but quickly drape it around your neck. (Mom would turn over in her grave if you put it on the FLOOR!), yank down your pants and assume The Stance. In this position your aging, toneless thigh muscles begin to shake.

You'd love to sit down, but you certainly hadn't taken time to wipe the seat or lay toilet paper on it, so you hold The Stance.

To take your mind off your trembling thighs, you reach for what you discover to be the empty toilet paper dispenser. In your mind, you can hear your mother's voice saying, "Honey if you had tried to clean the seat, you would have known there was no toilet paper." Your thighs shake more. You remember the tiny tissue that you blew your nose on yesterday-- the one thats still in your purse. Oh yeah.. the purse around your neck, that now, you have to hold up trying not to strangle yourself at the same time. That would have to do. You crumple it in the puffiest way possible. It's still smaller than your thumbnail.

Someone pushes your door open because the latch doesn't work. The door hits your purse which is hanging around your neck in front of your chest and you and your purse topple backward against the tank of the toilet. "OCCUPIED!" you scream, as you reach for the door, dropping your precious, tiny, crumpled tissue in a puddle on the floor, lose your footing altogether and slide down directly onto the TOILET SEAT. It is of wet of course. You bolt up, knowing all to well that it's too late. your bare bottom has made contact with every imaginable germ and life form on the uncovered seat because YOU never laid down toilet paper-- not that there was any, even if you had taken time to try. You know that your mother would be utterly appalled if she knew, because you're certain her bare bottom never touched a public toilet seat because frankly dear, "You just don't KNOW what kind of diseases you could get."
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By this time, the automatic sensor on the back of the toilet is so confused that it flushes, propelling a stream of water like a fire house against the inside of the bowl that sprays a fine mist of water that covers your butt and runs down your legs and into your shoes. The flush somehow sucks everything down with such force that you grab onto the empty toilet dispenser for fear of being dragged in too. At this point you give up. You're soaked by the spewing water and the wet toilet seat. You're exhausted. You try to wipe with a gum wrapper you found in your pocket and then slink out inconspicuously to the sinks.

You can't figure out how to operate the faucets with the automatic sensors, so you wipe your hands with spit and a dry paper towel and walk past the line of women, still waiting. You are no longer able to smile politely to them.

A kind soul at the very end of the line points out the piece of toilet paper trailing from your shoe. (Where was that when you needed it??) You yank the paper from your shoe, plunk it in the woman's hand and tell her warmly, "Here, you just might need this."

As you exit, you spot your hubby, who has long since entered, used, and left eh men's restroom. Annoyed he asks, "What took you so long, and why is your purse hanging around your neck?"


This is dedicated to women everywhere who deal with public restrooms. It also answers the commonly asked question about why women go to the bathroom in pairs. It's so the other gal can hold the door, hang onto your purse and hand you Kleenex under the door!

PS: Unfortunately, danny is unavoidably absent but has asked me to update his blog. I'm a 'colleague' of his. He's also my very good friend. Call me Anne.

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Have You Ever... (?)

“A man with a conviction is a hard man to change. Tell him you disagree and he turns away. Show him facts or figures and he questions your sources. Appeal to logic and he fails to see your point.” [Leon Festinger, et al., When Prophecy Fails (1956)]

Have you ever wondered why other people are so unreasonable and hard to convince? Why is it that they disregard hard facts that prove you’re right and they’re wrong? The fact is, we humans aren’t wired to think very rationally. That’s been confirmed recently by brain scans.

Psychological experiments have shown that humans tend to seek out even weak evidence to support their existing beliefs, and to ignore evidence that undercuts those beliefs. In the process, we apply stringent tests to evidence we don’t want to hear, while letting slide uncritically into our minds any information that suits our needs.

PS: I want to say a very BIG Thank You to all that sent in their congratulations on my new job. You guys are just awesome. Your prayers and vigils definitely worked and for that i'm so grateful. THANK YOU! As for those listing things (esp. Yosh), erhmmm...well, let me get my paycheck first then we talk,lol

PPS: I deliberately deactivated 'comment' for this post due to reasons best known to me. Do all have a lovely weekend. One!!

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YES! YES!! I GOT THE JOB!!!

Right!! No more suspense. I got the job!! I can't believe it! In about 3 week’s time, I will be working part time and piece time (you get to do a FULL color catalogue/brochure/almanac/calendar, etc) in the graphics room here as their new Graphic Designer, my dream job…for now... It hasn't sunk in yet...

FINAL MOMENTS
The lady manager showed me around and went over what she wants done and all that informal interview type stuff and at the end she was like "okay, so what do you charge?"

Totally unprepared for that type of question I said: ‘well, as long as it’s more than what I’m currently earning, it’s okay and she asks what I’m currently earning. I told her, and then she said, ‘OH! Well, we won’t have a problem with that. WE will pay YOU xx (pounds) an hour" (Hint: double of what I’m currently earning )

Then she asked when I would like to start! I was like WHAT!!! You mean I get to CHOOSE?! *cool:)* Oh God! I love this place and lady already 

I didn’t want to seem TOO eager so I said Nov. 1st and she replied, ‘No, you can start on the 5th on a Monday’ ‘In the meantime, if there are any special stuffs you’d like to have in YOUR (mine) office, just write and send them over to my office’

U.N.B.E.L.I.V.A.B.L.E!!

The working environment is soooo tastefully furnished and boasts of the best and most advanced facilities you can think of; you’ll enjoy every single second you’re here. Moreover, I report directly to her. I even have 2 junior staff under me. AND IT’S A PART TIME JOB. I BELIEVE in Miracles!! Thank You Lord!

At this time, I just want to say a great big massive *THANK YOU* for all the support I've had from all you lovely people about this. Thank you for the good luck wishes and the wise words, it all means so much to me.



In fact (whilst I'm in Oscar acceptance speech mode) I think it goes much deeper than just this week. Since I began this blog I have felt so much more motivated to make the work I want to make, and follow the ideas I want to follow. All your comments; positive, constructive and so friendly and sometimes, not so friendly, have made me realize that I can (and should!) make the things I like to make, and I've pushed myself too, because I want to show you the best work I can...

As you can see, I’m kind of happy about this, so share in my happiness and say something nice. BTW, who wants to hit the clubs with me, this weekend? It’s going to be different this time cos there’s ‘actually’ something to CELEBRATE! Do all have a lovely one. Cheers!!

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Life Goes on!

I miss you.
I know we've said our good-byes,
and I know we've gone ourseparate ways,
but I still miss youI wish that people were like chalkboards,
and we could wash our memories clean.
But we're not. And we can't.

Yet despite the anger that I feel sometimes,
I still miss you.
We were happy once,
and I remember those times.

I remember how we smiled and laughed,
and how you held my heart
in your hand.

I remember the tears and the fights
and how I took my heart back,
bruised and slightly wilted.

But still,
somehow,
I miss you,
and...
...I just wanted you to know that

PS: i should know the result of the job interview by tomorrow afternoon. Continue keeping those fingers crossed for me, good people ;)

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My Wet, Wild Weekend!!

Wow. I definitely need a weekend to recover from my weekend!!

Tons of people, lots of alcohol, sweet girls, great bafs...man, it was fun. No problems, no police visits, lol!

The real FUN was on Saturday when we had the ‘A Touch of White’ party. It was arguably the best student-organized party I’ve been to in Cyprus! And Thankfully I DIDN’T GET DRUNK…or NOT!!...wonder how I did that? Read on!

I hung out with my hommies, and a couple other people they knew. The party was what you could probably call a stereotypical party for young men and women.

More than 200 Africans (all over Cyprus) ended up chilling at Club Fiesta where the main activity was ingesting alcoholic beverages and the goal of at least some of those present was to get wasted. This however, was not my goal, so I limited my intake and watched events unfold.

In retrospect, I don't think it was a bad thing for me to do. I had a good conversation with a guy from Kenya, discovered that I don't like cheap red wine (at all), strengthened a few relationships, and had some REAL fun while I was at it.

I can’t remember vividly all that went down at the parry but at a stage I saw myself dancing on top one of the HUGE speakers, with one SUPER chic. I can’t even remember how I climbed there, it was all hazy ;)...or the chica's name :(

At a stage, I got confused, thinking I was at one Naija club cos all the music played was 90% naija jamz, from Yahooze, Kolomental, ruggedman, 2face to Sound Sultan, even Fela. It was ecstatic! A lot of people later confessed they had an out-of-body experience,lol!

So yeah. I'm so wiped out! It was worth it, though ;) I love parties...

PS: I have a job interview for the position of a Graphic Designer for the numero uno publishing house in Cyprus. Remember me in your prayers.

..until then, keep living in the atmosphere of…erhmmm…Ok I forgot, SUE ME!,lol!!

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I Hate This Class!!

DISCLAIMER:
I do not hate learning.
I do not hate classes.
On the contrary, I LOVE IT.

I hate large groups of self-entitled idiots who hamper your ability to function in a class through their intentional ignorance, their profound stupidity, and their unbelievable ability to avoid all semblance of actual thought. Likewise, I despise that it is possible for those blights on society to graduate, and somehow worm into a position to teach the next generation of blights on society. That said...

So I'm really annoyed with one of my classes right now. It's Teleconferencing and Computer Supported Cooperative Work. The title sounds terrible, and... yeah, the class pretty much is, too.

See, the thing is, the class is really fun while you're there, but then the instructor will give us these HORRENDOUS homework assignments. He's really laid back, and always showing us cool "nerd stuff," and he tries to make class fun and interesting... Pretty much, he makes us think he's our friend, then BAM, without warning -- he hits us with these terrible assignments!

One of our assignments was a group assignment, where we had a week to design a new email client, but we could only communicate with our group members through AIM or GoogleDocs. Well, my group had two failed meetings where only one other person besides me showed up -- and I skipped my fav. Cyprus soap for one of those meetings, so I was pretty pissed. We finally were all able to meet the night before the assignment was due. We were supposed to come up with a visual representation of what our client would look like –

Needless to say, it came out all wrong! Oh! I hate group assignments!!!

And! The final project for that class is supposed to be a 30-40 page research paper about effing Facebook...KILL ME NOW!

MEH.

I should teach this class. The professor might learn something

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What's Her Deal?!?

Me and my ex (penultimate) girlfriend broke up last year before I met N... And she found another [a guy she went out with previously in high school and from similar religious background.]

But here’s the thing... She doesn't care about none of her ex boyfriends except for me... she told me this in exact words: "I don’t know if you let your friends talk about me... But I would never let a guy come up to me and disrespect you or what we had... and that’s my word."

Yesterday, I happen to visit her myspace page... and there’s a new picture of me that says "We aren't as close as before...I don't know why...but your still my friend." ...and she has a boyfriend, and he (the current boyfriend) isn't even on her Myspace that much...
But he has one too... And he's on her top four.

We still text each other occasionally, normal everyday sturvs and today...she was like "My mom knows we had sex! hehe. =)"

What is her deal?
Why does she want to be so close to me? H.E.L.P!!!

She broke up with me by the way...

She always tries to get in contact with me... And she goes on the computer to see if I'm on all the time... cause when I sign on... she signs on.

What's her deal?

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A Woman's Worth...

A person's worth in this world is estimated according to the value they put on themselves. Jean De LaBruyere

What is a woman's worth? Is it synonymous with value? Who defines it? Is it a tangible thing? Are they born into it, marry into it, or do they earn it?


A woman's worth cannot be over emphasized, yet their sense of self-esteem, self-respect, and self-efficacy seems to fluctuate and waiver. Women consistently seek approval from others in order to adjust their self-esteem meter, which is understandable given that they continue to face inconsistencies in their lives!



Women worry about their worth, ability, value, stature, physical appearance, and often base their assumptions about themselves - even to the point of establishing their identity -- on the opinions of others.


ENOUGH!!! It's time for us as humans to grow up. Female, male -- both genders are equally needed, and both are equally worthy. Women are highly capable of changing the status quo. To do so, however, they’ll need to apply their formidable talents to this task, and raise their voices with at least the same tenacity and fervor as their male counterparts.


Simply put, women have this tendency of measuring their worth on the outcomes of their lives. If their careers, relationships, and money are doing well then they feel like they are worth something. However, if anything within their life is shifted out of balance, they begin to question what they did wrong or better yet ask ‘how this could happen to me?’


Ask better questions. Instead of asking yourself “what did I do wrong?” or “why does this always happen to me?” practice looking at yourself in the mirror before you start your day and ask yourself “what am I worth?” or “how may I change my attitude towards this situation or person?”


Stop holding on to feelings of worthlessness and respond. Holding on to unhealthy perceptions about yourself shuts down your spirit and emotions. Responding helps you “move” into a place of creating a better outlook for your person and situation.


Look at your past experiences as just that, the past. As a man, what I have learnt is that when I held on to how people perceived how I “should” be, I felt like a complete failure when I could not live up to their expectations. I personally found myself being my worse enemy as I criticized myself to no end. It was not until I shifted my thoughts to my present situation(s) for that specific day that I realized that I had control over my feelings and emotions.


You have the choice to decide whether or not you want to be enslaved by feelings of worthlessness or experience the freedom of being worthy.


Choose wisely!!!


Lucky is the man who is the first love of a woman,
but luckier is the woman who is the last love of a man

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Naija Independence in Cyprus (pics)

PS: i was already drunk by the time i was called up for an award, so don't mind the 'face' lol!

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