Whatever Will Be Will Be

Hi guys, I know everybody is bubbling fine...lol! I’ve been catching up on some few things here myself, though I was down with the ever notorious London flu this past week; kept me much indoors. But, hey, am back now and very much better. Sorry i’ve not updated for a minute. Remember I told you guys I was restricted to few hours of internet access everyday :( Doting sisters can also be mean and stubborn when they want to, hehe.

Err, lemme give a shout out to some peeps, June...me and you’ll enter same trouser oo J of course you know what I’m talking about. I’m a babe; I haven’t stopped ogling ever since...lol hope you’re tight. And to you wonderful peeps out there, my ‘virtual’ friends, you guys RAWKS!

A lot of things have been going on around me, some good and some bad. On Sunday, I was at a friend’s family house off A41. They were celebrating the recent political appointment of their Dad. Here’s wishing them a stress and EFCC free time. I also saw Harry Potter and the Order of Phoenix on Thursday at the VUE on Finchley Road. I was going to watch it at the newly refurbished Everyman Hampstead but BIG sister overruled ;) It wasn’t ALL THAT but very interesting though my fav. Still remains Goblet of Fire. I’m not a spoiler so I won’t tell you what happened to Harry, Hermione and Ron, or the others in the end. If you insist, you know how to get in touch.

Coming closer home, i’ve been undergoing a lot of emotional turmoil lately. It’s all wrong, I know but sometimes it’s better to take a decision than wait for a miracle to happen. Not every relationship is meant to be. Love alone cannot make a relationship work long-term. You need support from all immediate members in the family, a willingness to share just about all aspects of your life together, communication and trust. While you may have the communication and trust, you do not have the other two. Of course there should be compromises but when it becomes almost impossible for one party to come half way. It’s always one way and none other, then...

I don’t want to spend much time on this topic. Do have a lovely week guys.

PS: I deliberately didn't say anything about london's CURSED weather cos..well, you know the rest, yea, it's England for you. Fucking thing kept me in bed, ill for the better part of last week :(

. Collapse...

Random Musings from England!

Ok, so I’m finally in England, came in early Saturday. My flight was almost cancelled due to the extreme weather currently plaguing UK. You need to see the catastrophic effects in Gloucestershire to know what I’m talking about. It’s devastating. Whole buildings washed away, while others are almost enveloped by the rising flood water. Thankfully, I won’t be going anywhere there soon. London is still the same ol’ London. Nothing much has changed in my about 18 month’s absence. I’m in my other sis new pad in Hampstead, north London.

I was supposed to stay in thamesmead but last minute pleasure trip by my sister (the one I wrote about), her hubby and kids put paid to that. I really love to stay with her cos I get to drive the Porsche...lol! Ok, truth be told, I’m not happy with the weather at all. I woke up today with the sounds of rain beating the rooftops and window shutters. It’ bad already that the weather is still cold in the middle of summer, but worse with the Katrina-like effect of the floods taking their tolls on other parts of UK.

For crying out loud, I came over to have a time out, max 2 weeks but I’m seriously considering going back to Cyprus this weekend or early next week. I miss the SUN, exotic beaches and FREEDOM.

Did I tell you guys I was given limited time of daily internet usage. I’m already in trouble with my sis. She accused me of being an internet junkie. According to her, she ‘heard’ I spend more than 10 hrs in front of the computer daily…hehehe. Yea, she’s that ‘protective’. In fact they are all, 5 of them, but I still love them to bits.

I’ve not really been out since I came over here for the short hols. My closest pals have relocated to the states, so it’s either I make new ones or marry my laptop. After much consideration, I chose the latter. After all, I won’t be here long before going back to Cyprus. All male and female bonding have to wait till summer 2008, when I’ll be thru with my studies in CY. I may have to disappoint some naija uk-resident bloggers that made me promise to meet up, especially J. I’ll see how I can arrange a meet. Cheers!

I so love my sis new house here. It’s so lovely and a masterpiece. I forgot my camera in CY but I’ll borrow one from a friend and get you guys some pics. I have one problem though. Can someone tell me the best polite way to tell doting sisters that I’m now a grown ass man and all the pampering should stop? Seriously, it’s getting slightly uncomfortable (though, I inwardly enjoy every bit of it)

‘Nna, are you hungry?’
‘Are you sure you’ve eaten enough?’
‘Should I call home delivery?’
‘Have you taken your bath yet?’ Blimey! Maybe you wanna come scrub my back for me...LOL!
‘Come see what I ordered for you from Bromleys!’ it goes on and on. The list is endless.

Ok…truth be told, I enjoy it and always look forward to it…Yea, I know. I’m pathetic...hehehe. I can’t help it, can I? Anyways, I may be going to Everyman Hampstead in Holly Bush Vale on Thursday to catch Harry Potter and the order of Phoenix. It’s just off Heath St and close enough to where I’m staying. Here’s wishing you all the very best of the week. From me to you; Take Charge.

. Collapse...

Happy Birthday to A Wonderful Sister

I’ve tried writing this as a post for the perfect blog entry. I tried to write so my readers could have some clue to what a stand-out sister you are. I tried picking out a song that would capture who you are so they could feel what I feel.

13 cd’s later - I’m stuck. I’m stuck not being able to express myself clearly.

How could they ever know? How could they ever feel what I feel? Could they?
I hear stories all the time about sisters and how much they love each other and their ONLY brother. Sometimes love isn’t everything.

What I remember most about our kiddie days was not just love, but the security you gave me. You made sure I didn’t grow up too fast; you let me be a little boy living in a fantasy world where I was a prince with flowers in my hair. It wasn’t always easy being my big sister, but I never felt like I wasn’t welcome anywhere you went. I remember watching you dance with your boyfriends. Watching you be my older sister was always with so much pride. I had the prettiest sister of all my friends. I had the sister that dressed me up and made sure I wasn’t left out or picked on by any of her friends.

When you got married we went out and picked the wedding clothes together. How do I remember this? I was so young then. I don’t remember with great clarity every day, but I can place my feelings perfectly…I felt safe. No matter what, I was safe.

After you were married I was always welcome to stay with you anytime I wanted. You would come get me and we would hang out. With everything going on in your life you still let me live in my fantasy world where everything was pretty horses and magic. My time with you was always an adventure.

As we got older I still spent days at your house. You had transformed from the prettiest sister into the ‘hottest’ sister. We got to share stories and you showed me that you understood me on new levels. We got to tell each other stories that didn’t involve magic unicorns and rainbows. We started to connect and understand where the other one was coming from.

In my teens I was still a huge part of your life. You made sure of that. You made room for me no matter how small the house you lived in. When the houses got bigger I got my own room. Through the hardest times in my life I ended up on the phone with you. In extreme cases I ended up at your door. You said once that your favorite sound was hearing me say that I was right around the corner...how funny.

That feeling never gets old; knowing that if I live in my fantasy world, screw up, make mistakes and fall flat on my face that you ‘ll be there to stare at me…shrug your shoulders…laugh a little and say, “Yeah. We’ve all been there Danny.” and you still love me and you’re still proud of me. I know that no matter what you’ll get that smile on your face when I walk through the door and we will laugh the whole time we are together. We will talk until long after we have anything important to say and probably laugh so much that we cry and our faces hurt.

There is no way for me anyone to even grasp the depth of the love I have always had for you.
You have been my mother, my sister and my best friend for so many years that I can’t imagine a single day without you in it.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMARACHI ANGELA .O.

Your little BIG brother,
Ugo Daniels .O.

. Collapse...

The First Blogville Wedding?

Ok, i know i shouldn't be saying this, considering my 'getting married' allergies or what i like to call Mariphobia-fear of marriage...lol! I noticed something in blogville on my many blog rounds. It's a common sight these days to see bloggers making out or secretly flirting with one another, whether casually or otherwise...hehe

Now, wouldn't it be so nice to have a BLOGGERS WEDDING. I mean 2 known or unknown bloggers gettitng married, not on blogville, but doing the actual 'thing' The idea or thought is so overwhelming, don't you think. Of course, i may be mistaken. Probably, it had happened already and i didn't know.

Well, who knows...maybe some couple will take the cue and tie those knots, walk down that aisle and say those damn words 'I DO'...you never can tell...

CASE 2: IS THIS NORMAL? Girl A never wanted to have anything to do with you untill she sees you with Girl B. Now, she can't get enough of you. What's up with that, eh my learned blogger ladies. I wanna know if it's a common practise among girls or just a random occurence.

---

AND I'M ROOCKING THIS SONG, must have watched it over a hundred times. CHINWE IKE by Resonance

---

---

. Collapse...

No Retreat, No Surrender!!!

I’m not in a very good mood today. Last night, I watched as the flying eagles of Nigeria were thrashed 4-0 by Chile. Surprisingly, it was the first time I watched them since the U-20 world cup started. I always read the news the next day but this was the quarter finals and, moreover, some friends came around and I was forced to join them and watch. I would have preferred watching my late night movies or playing games..lol!

One of my friends that came to watch the quarter final match at my place really pissed me off. Till the game lasted, this guy was busy shouting ‘NO RETREAT, NO SURRENDER’ ‘NOTHING DEY HAPPEN’. At the initial stage, when he started saying it, it was kind of funny and I laughed a bit but when he launched it into an anthem, every 10 seconds, the same phrase, ‘No Retreat, No Surrender’ I nearly slapped him. Wtf!! It made me so mad I wanted to run mad. But, nothing I threatened to do made him desist. He’s one of those soccer fanatics that know which player plays for which club, club transfers, points, MVP, HGS, all the works. I don’t blame him sha. He breathes soccer.

Apparently, it was his way of cheering the Nigerian lads on. By constantly saying same thing over and over again, especially anytime the Nigerian players came close to scoring or missed a golden opportunity, he believed he could work some magic, zeal, momentum and seriousness into the guys…for where? The Nigerians were languid in attack with an attitude of "another chance will soon come along so no need to get upset". Chile with fantastic precision passing and great one touch play proved a hard nut to crack in the end.

It was a pity we went out like that, 4-0! Damnit. My neighbors had a good laugh at my expense this morning when we discussed the match. They’re from Cameroon, anyways. They always derive some sadistic and maybe sexual joy deriding me anytime the Nigeria soccer team, whether National Team, U-20, U-21, U-30, U-60 played and 'wobbled'. It wasn’t funny at all. The Nigerian players have got a lot of talent, no doubt, but they lacked finesse, organization, and focus.

Be that as it may, we lost the game and lost woefully. A lot of people like Chxta believed we were short changed by a referee that was biased in his judgments. Even the Nigerian coach, Bosso, was quoted by Canadian news agency as saying that the referee is a racist..Oooops. In his exact words, ‘What I’m saying is that it’s good to fight racism but it’s important not only to bring in the idea, you have to follow it to the letter so that implementation is done.’ Even the captain echoed sinilar thoughts, ‘When you concede a goal you feel is not a goal,” he said, “you feel you’ve been cheated, but you can’t do nothing about it. We knew something like this would come off’

What a sad Sunday for the Nigerian teenagers or should I say Adults, like my friend mentioned. Moreover, i lost a $200 bet, coupled with sad news back home. Hopefully, he's doing great now. I'm in a terrible mood today...lol!

. Collapse...

Why Am I So Jealous?

Ok, hope you guys don’t say ‘Here he goes again’..lol! Actually, I’ve gotten to that stage in life when I ask questions, whether rhetoric or otherwise on issues bothering me.

You see, jealousy is something I’ve always fought against cos I know its origin, journey and repercussions. It can tear a man into two; actually turn a vibrant man, full of energy into a whimpering mess in a record time. Jealousy is a very hard emotion to control; it takes your stomach and twists it into knots until you scream for release. Problem is when we scream it is usually misunderstood and frowned upon…Now, that’s where the –ish starts!

Imagine having a fear, and your mouth is glued shut so you are unable to voice your pain and terror. This is a small example of how a person feels when their jealousy takes a hold of their mind. If they talk about it, they appear accusing and confrontational. Others feel they are being attacked for something they have no control of. It truly is a no win situation for anyone involved. But to keep it glued inside only gives birth to an ugly seed of pain, agony and real loneliness.

It feeds on our strength making us weak in our judgment of what is real and what’s not. We are in a prison that separates us from a world of happiness. Why I ask? Why are we in this prison when we did not ask to be? We broke no rules to be punished for. When we look at another person, we see only what we wish to be. It blinds us of who we are and what we have to offer to the world. It captivates our minds to the point of no return in many cases has caused terrible results.

Jealousy does have one fear, which is "Love". Love conquers all and that is as real as the pain we feel inside when we are imprisoned by the fears of jealousy.

I will not stop till I unlock and set myself free from Jealousy

. Collapse...

To Trust or Not To Trust!

Trust is something we learn as very small babies. We trust the first person that we bond with and it grows from there. Have you ever noticed how cool kids are? They trust every little thing we say. They rarely question us when we tell them something. They just gaze and swallow everything we say, hook, line and sinker. Isn’t that amazing! They believe our every word; and why not? They have not been exposed to mistrust yet, not that they would recognize it at such an early age.

Then they get older and come in contact with other children. They find out that it is not normal to be touched by people in their private parts. They find that it is not normal to watch their dad hit their mom. They find lies, which give birth to MISTRUST. Their lives turn an entire chapter at that point. They grow up somehow; suffering through the pain and loneliness of living with mistrust.

When we first fall in love; what is that saying, "Love is Blind"? Ha! Now that's funny, because it really is blind. We trust so instantly and genuinely that we potentially set ourselves up for the biggest fall in our lives. Why is that? Is it because we are so driven by nature to want to trust someone? Or is trusting someone just a happier, easier, way of life.

Once a trust is breached, it creates a scar that has its own heart and never goes away. We just learn to ignore its beat. We try to reorganize our minds and put it on the farthest burner we have. Some of us can do just that, while others cannot. For them life is not so easy. They find themselves thinking, should I trust or not? It's like they have to find proof and reason to trust, because their minds already mistrust. This is similar to the term "Guilty until proven innocent".

For anyone out there that can relate to that, and I am sure there are many of you that do just that, life is hell. If, lets say we love someone and they tell us one thing, and we keep getting mixed signals that stir up our mistrust thoughts, where do we go with that? Books tell us, that we are to trust the ones we love and that's it. And then, if our trust gets breached, and only then, can we be accurate with our mistrust. "Blah" I say! Oh and we're also told at the same time to trust our gut feelings. OK, I admit confusion here.

I know this subject is really going to cut like a knife for some people and I will apologize now, but we have to deal with the reality of our lives. How else are we going to tackle our insecurities and get stronger? Our goal is to have a somewhat happy life. One that we can talk about to our grandchildren. If your relationship has had a breach of trust or if you have experienced mistrust earlier in your lives, then you already have a reason to feel insecure. Now that you know that, you can start to build up on that. Now you need to identify the exact core of it and toss it. Its old news and its over.

Feeling mistrust definitely has been caused by something in our lives. We may never figure it out and some of us have already figured their reasons out. But for whatever the reason, it is a negative emotion and one we can surely do without. Again I have shared my thoughts with all of you. I would love to hear your thoughts.

I take responsibility for my life.

I have the power to make things better.

I always have a choice.

Like the Christ Embassy brethern would say, 'I KNOW WHO I AM'

. Collapse...

Does the Size 'REALLY' Matter?

WARNING: SLIGHTLY EXPLICIT IMAGE

. Collapse...